Operation Big Double

I was agent/manager for a band in the Middle East called Fools Goal and occasionally played a little blues harmonica with them. This story/blog was prompted by Richard "Crawdaddy" Dance and I reminiscing about a night when I booked them for two gigs, to be done simultaneously for the US Consulate and the Aramco Oil Company's employee Golf Club. Richard is still active in the music world and is very accomplished musician. You can check out his tunes on myspace.com/mycrawdaddy . The following is a military parody on the night of the Big Double.

Like Rommel when he rode deep into Egypt, with his tanks and armored battalion, we rode deep into Dhahran when the legend of Operation Big Double began. The US Consulate Marine guard and hundreds of Aramcons swinging golf clubs posed a big challenge to a band of brothers called Fools Goal. What does one do when confronted with this onslaught. I'll tell what you do! You call in Captain Tombstone Johnstone, the commando of gigs, the special ops expert and Ninja of deployment.

We were to engage our audience on two fronts, not a good idea tactically speaking , unless you are with a band of men called Fools Goal. My orders were to take command of Fools Goal, as soon as possible, in order to kick our enemy of boredom in the ass on two fronts. The US Consulate and the Aramco Golf Club. The Golf Club presented a special challenge in that we were to engage them on an island, in the middle of a man made lake, on the golf course.

Musical instruments were our weapons of choice. The hopelessness of resisting our rock and roll tactics soon became evident. Here is how Operation Big Double went down.

We had two Disco DJ's dug in at each location. They were deployed in the rear and would cover our lightning maneuvers between each gig. In our first engagement the US Consulate Marines had already been hit hard by our DJ spinning back up tunes by James Brown, the hardest working man in show business.

Our first onslaught lasted 45 minutes. We layed down a barrage of tunes that staggered them. Many of them surrendered, or fell to the rear. Simultaneously the 2nd DJ deployed at the Golf course, began to soften up our target with his tunes. The golfers there were startled to see us charging over rocks that led to the island, in the middle of the lake. I had wheeled our band of brothers from the Consulate to the Golf course in 15 minutes flat. We jacked into our equipment already set up there. We inflicted heavy losses on them and were virtually unopposed.

Spearheading our mission I wheeled Fools Goal back and forth as our attack continued. Our band of brothers were gallant under fire and we didn't sustain one loss. Comic relief came when the Master of Ceremonies at the golf course fell into the lake, while trying to get to our position on the island. How could any one oppose us? We were not even there half the time.

As we bounced along the road between gigs, I realized that my men were exhausted and abandoned my plans for the Big Triple. I got a few looks that told me these type of operations were over. If I would have had my way Fools Goal band members would have all been awarded the Distinguished Musicians Flying Cross. Operation Big Double is still highly disputed by historians, but the success of their daring do is supported by the fact that half the time our audience didn't even know where we were, in this unconventional operation. Exhausted from our onslaught , I can still see us pursuing the audience as they broke and fled for home.We were an invincible band of men called Fools Goal. Our impact on the world is represented by the common phrase we all hear in adventure films and police epics when they say "Lets Rock and Roll" they have inherited our legacy and know the legend of Fools Goal.

I'm old now and nodding by the fire, but to my ear from far away, I can still hear Fools Goal play on the night of the Big Double.

Captain Tombstone Johnstone